Friday, March 7, 2008

How to Raise your Cyborg Child: A Self Help Article

Back at the turn of the millennium kids were still organic, except for a few odd chemicals floating through their bodies that they had picked up from their food and the environment. Those extra chemicals generally didn't count as un-natural until the Chicken Nugget incident of 2015 when over three hundred thousand fast food patrons concocted a rare form of modified protein syndrome from the GM chicken they consumed. From that time on, being 100% all natural meant that you were probably a follower of the Vegan Luddites or one of the very rare inhabitants of some lost forgotten tribe of happy people. Yes, things surely changed when the government decided to label and track you as to how organic you truly were. Now in 2027 it's hard to imagine a time when we didn't have muscle implants and memory managers. Back when we had to communicate strictly through the written word and voice communications things were so different than they are today. Kids now don't even remember what it was like to have to type on a keyboard and use a mouse to navigate around the Internet. They can't imagine a world where your music wasn't sent wirelessly to your brain, complete with syneasthetic visuals. They can't imagine a world where they didn't constantly become physically and emotionally part of technology.

Yes, kids back in those blissful days were still mushy little things that ate and slept like other life forms on the planet once did before the Grey Goo incident of 2019. Kids talked, walked, and got in trouble much like they had for thousands upon thousands of years before. As we know, times change, it seems just like last week that kids didn't even have interfaces between their uLife devices and their central nervous systems. Now they are all connected and sending each other their latest downloaded sensations.

As parents who grew up prior to "The Emergence" it is hard to understand these new higher life forms we call our kids. It's hard to give them any kind of valued information on how to live their lives when our own experiences have been so far removed from what they are now going through. History is no longer a valid measure of the present situations in which we find ourselves. Our offspring are on their own, living their lives to their own creation off of the cultures and technologies we have built. In a world where technology is changing on a weekly and sometimes daily basis, how do you manage to grow and nurture the life you brought into the world? Unfortunately those of us who have been left behind and managed to fall at a generation where having organic infants is normal, it seems we are at a loss. We are the "left-behinds", those that are less important than our children. Technology is teaching our kids how to live and we are often just sideline observational lower life forms.


Luckily this archaic form of communication, known as blogging, is here for you. As a parent of a child that is on the verge of the upcoming Technological Singularity we all may be wondering what is ahead of us. Within the next decade or so we are going to experience shifts in human life that not all of us will be able to join in. We are not all biologically or technologically compatible with the requirements of the Singularity. Some of us will be left behind to carry on the lower life form that is the organic human. No one knows what relationships will be like between the upper and lower minds that will develop after this time. Many of us will have children that move forward and we should all be prepared to let them go from this reality that we all share. Hopefully when our children move forward we will still be loved by them. There is no doubt that they will be smarter than us. They will know and understand things beyond our feeble comprehension. Will they still love and take care of us? In the past, before all these technological advancements, children often grew beyond and looked down upon their parents because of the differences in their generations. Will this reality be magnified by progress? It is at these times you should hope that you raised your children with strong morals and a desire to protect the family. At these times when your children are no longer biological, you should hope that they still love the lesser parts of themselves.

Sarah McOnagh (not her real name) has a seven year old that has already taken an implant for interspersed knowledge and has mastered the ability to communicate with the corporate AIs. Sarah claims that her son has now decided that minds below that of the corporate personal entity are not allowed to communicate with him. Sarah has been cut off from her juvenile child. Not able to understand the corporate entities Sarah feels alone and unable to help her child. Sarah, the only thing you can do is let go. Your child has already progressed and has surpassed your abilities to understand. If you are one of the incompatible, it is best for you to just move out of your current cubicle and migrate out to the wild to live with the Luddites. Don't fear, you will be taken care of by the fortunate others that are dispersed amongst the atoms.

John Derick has a teenage daughter who has merged completely with the virtual pop world of the Furry Lateral Transies. He talks to her on occasion, but has a hard time getting used to the fact that her physical body is now dead and buried at the local cemetery and she only speaks to him through his uLife player. He says that she is different now. Being a doctor of biologicals he claims that the chemical interactions of the brain and the interactions of the physical world can not be completely re-created within the virtual world. Unfortunately, John's daughter was an early adopter. She thought that the singularity was here and decided to move forward. Her true self was forever lost and only an "image" of her is left behind. She is forever a simulation that will only grow within an artificial world that is not a valid representation of the world she left behind. If you are like John, you should mourn the loss of your child and move on toward whatever reality technology has in store for you.

Robert and Leslie Dupre have an "idiot savant" child that has been able to create a virtual world full of musical realities that have made them billions. Robert quit his job as a day laborer within the stem cell farms of Northern Ontario to further his desire of creating an on-line immersive world where elderly pre-cog men can have constant sex with young nubile women. The family is now worth several trillions and they are in control of the third dorm world of Lorrington. If you have a child that shows any kind of unique abilities, you should take immediate action and move them into the right direction that will allow them complete power over their lives and give you a comfortable existence in yours. Worlds are easy to create, wealth isn't so easy. The future is power, your special organic children are worth money.

Jarod and Natalie Daniels have a son who is the co-creator of the first recognized self sufficient universe that is completely cut off from ours. The inhabitants of this universe are already becoming self aware. Enough processing power and memory has been allocated to them so that they may create their own universes within the computer system that they reside. John Daniel has declared himself a god and has moved completely into his own digital world where he can overlook his creation and help grow it to its full potential. Robert, the father of John, asks "how the hell did this happen?" He never thought deeper than the reality of the 20Th century and couldn't imagine the world in which we live. Unfortunately Robert and Natalie are so far removed from their son that they can no longer effectively communicate with him.

Young people are getting implants at an alarming rate. Some kids are already 80% merged with other worlds while a few vehemently reject the merging. If you are a parent of a child that refuses to become a part of the future of humanity, what should you do? Well, if you are along with them in their beliefs, then it is an easy decision. You simply need to take your family out of the city and live in the wilderness and die a natural death like the lesser beings of the organic past. If you are someone who thinks that your child is wrong and you need help in forcing them into understanding, then there are plenty of places to turn towards. The "Human Inclusion Agency" is always willing to help consume your child into the next step of ascension. Don't let their fears of rebirth get in the way of their moving forward. As a parent there are tough choices to make, and at these times it is important for you to make the right decisions. Don't let your children fall behind and die a natural death. Let them live forever and be part of the worlds that will move throughout the Universe. Let us all be part of the whole.

The main thing in this day and age is to realize that you as a parent no longer have any valuable input into your child's life. You are archaic and out of date. You should ask for help on-line with the many transient organizations that are there to help you and your family in the transition from the wet and old to the new and shiny world that awaits us all in a blissful merging of all intelligent life on the planet Earth. When we are all one and move out at the speed of light, then we will truly be happy and feel complete. There is no need to fear life, there is no need for stress. It is only together as one where we are all equal and working towards a common goal that we will be happy. Let us all move forward and learn as one.

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